


perfection isn't perfect

by fallonross (orphan_account)



Category: Dynasty (TV 2017)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-03
Updated: 2020-08-24
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:21:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25685722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/fallonross
Summary: young fallon carrington thrives on having everything go her way. she plans everything to perfection.her day, what she eats, when she leaves, etc... but what happens when the perfection takes control of her?
Relationships: Blake Carrington & Original Female Character(s), Fallon Carrington & Monica Colby, Fallon Carrington & Original Female Character(s)
Kudos: 15





	1. just coffee

**Author's Note:**

> ED TW!!!!!!! im warning you now so dont get upset at me later.
> 
> im setting the time as 2020ish so it will be easier to write. she'll have phones, compuers, etc... but this is still young fallon.

Fallon woke up at 5am sharp (she did everyday) to go to work out. She ran laps around the manor, pedaled on an elyptical for at LEAST 3 miles, and then did sit-ups in her room for thirty minutes. the staff had gotten used to the girls peculiar behavior and didn’t question it, just watched as she ran by over and over. then, by 6:30 she was promptly done working out and took a 10 minute (cold) shower. at 7:00 she was dressed and ready for school, and proceeded to head downstairs for a cup of (black) coffee.  
the lack of nutrients concerned no one, considering the girl wasn’t given much attention. so at 7:15, everyday, while the girl drank her coffee, she whipped out a little notebook and wrote (nearly, organized by date and time)  
𝐵𝑙𝑎𝑐𝑘 𝐶𝑜𝑓𝑓𝑒𝑒: 𝑧𝑒𝑟𝑜 𝑐𝑎𝑙𝑜𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑠  
the drink got rid of the ache in her stomach, convincing it that it had something to digest, something to use throughout the day.  
7:30 sharp, (as you can guess the young girl is a stickler for time) she stood by the door waiting for the car to pull up and analyzed herself in the mirror. she turned every which way, pinching this, poking that. she was never satisfied, and her daily observation period was always ended by a dull roar and the sound of tire hitting gravel. she sighed, picked up her bag with great effort, and slid into the back seat of the car.  
“good morning, miss?” the elderly driver asked. Mr.Elmer, she had called him for as long as she can remember. that wasn’t his real name, and she regretfully didn’t know how she placed “mr. elmer” upon him, but like the name applied, it just stuck.  
“perfect.” she replied, brushing her fingers through her hair, ignoring the massive amounts that fell out by doing so. it really was perfect. everything on time and to her liking. she smiled contently and spent the rest of the ride chattering with the man, about everything and anything.  
what Fallon didn’t know is Albert Johnson, (his real name, and HE didn’t know how Mr. Elmer occurred either) was aware of the young ladies struggles. not exactly, no. but a little bit of his heart broke everytime she slid into the car, looking thinner and sicker everyday. Fallon didn’t see the sad, grandfatherly look he gave her when she would talk, but he didn’t know what to do besides be there for the girl, lord know no one else was.  
they pulled into the school, fallon spotting Monica waiting for her by the entrance as usual. she thanked Albert, and he blew her a kiss as she walked up the steps to the door.  
instead of driving away, he sat in his car, watching Fallon walk up the steps,noticing the way the sun made her paler, and how much he had really lost his little girl. he snapped back to attention and a honk from the car behind him and proceeded forward.

“Fallon! you’re late.” Monica said, passing her a cup of coffee.  
“What?!” she replied, looking at her watch. “shit! it must have set back or something, uhhh what time is it?”  
monica watched her, amused for a second. “I was joking, chill.”  
“not. funny.” she said, taking a few swigs of her coffee absendmindetly, when a realization hit her.  
panic arising, fallon looked at monica. “what is this?” she questioned, raising the cup, her voice wavering.  
“a vanilla latte- you used to get them all the time and then you stopped. i thought you would like it.”  
Fallons eyes grew wide and started watering. something in her changed. “WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS?! i said BLACK! BLACK COFFEE! you changed it!” monica shrunk back, suprised by the reaction. Fallons outburst started gathering the attention of others.  
“Fal, i’m sorry, it’s just coffee...” her friend replied, trying to defend herself.  
“Its not JUST coffee ok?! it’s messed up my whole schedule. do you know how many calories are in this?! oh my god now i have to skip dinner...” she stopped abruptly, suddenly aware of everyone watching. “you know what? it’s fine. it’s fine, it’s fine. i’m sorry for yelling at you, it’s all good. im going to head inside.”  
with that she walked away, leaving Monica and her classmates bewildered.

the heavy oak door swang shut behing fallon, enveloping her in the silence of the old building. normally she would appreciate it, but the quiet only increased the volume of her sobs. she rushed to the girls bathroom and locked the door, pacing back and forth.  
it would have been hard to watch, but the poor girl was left alone. fallon wrung her hands, cracked her knuckles, strung them through her hair. she couldn't believe what she had just done.

then a terrfying thought emerged in her head.  
"you know how to get rid of it..." the voice said, clouding her brain.  
"i- i don't." she replied, but she didnt even convince herself.  
"get rid of it and everything will be perfect again..." the voice reminded her, tying itself tighter around the girl, weaving its way through her brain.

the word 'perfect' is what caught her. one little word and fallon became a slave to this voice.

she gulped down water from the sink, and planted herself in front of the toilet.  
"are you sure?" fallon asked the voice, scared.  
"perfectly." the sick thing replied.

and in that second fallon was gone. what was left of her was heaved into the bathroom. there was no little bit of the beloved friend, daughter, neice. the voice had full control.

perfection comes with a price.


	2. just a sleepover pt.1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> desperatly trying to make up with monica after her unexpected outburst, fallon incites the request of a sleepover, only becuase she was sure that her friend would disagree. instead, fallon is left with a yes, and now has to figure out how to control this situation what with all of the variables to keep her secret, well... secret.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ED TW!  
> ED TW!  
> ED TW!
> 
> please DO NOT blame me if you get triggered by this becuase i have put a warning- so if you get triggered thats on you.
> 
> not my best work and kinda short- i just kinda whammed it out so i could get out some content- they'll be more tomorow!

Fallon slid into class as if nothing had happened, ignoring the looks and whispers from fellow peers.

"What. Was. THAT?!" Monica harshly whispered to Fallon as she took her seat.

"I'm sorry, ok? Rough morning, i shouldn't have done that. I'll make it up. Sleepover tonight?" Fallon asked, really, really hoping for a no as she usually gets.

to fallons horror, her best friend replied with a perky "Sure!" leaving her deep in her thoughts, trying to figure out how to pull this off.

~you're an idiot~ the voice said, as soon as monica turned away.

'I know, it'll be fine though! I can make it work!'

~you're going to have to eat in front of her... you're GOING to get caught. is that what you want? to expose us? to lose control and become a worthless, fat, ugly, no good...~

"Fallon!" her teachers voice snapped her out of the spiral.

"Hm?" she inquired, moving to face her.

"Attendance? or should i just mark you as MENTALLY not here?!" the class snickered at the womans joke while Fallons cheeks blushed bright red.

She vowed to stay alert for the rest of school, but a similar scenario worked out in every class, and honestly, fallon was greatful when lunch arrived. She snuck out of her fifth period class early, careful to avoid monica as she swiftly threw her lunch into the trash, hearing the paper bag and its contents crash with the countless lunches from the days before.

Fallon made her way to the library and sat herself in the corner, unseen and unvisited by most students. Alone once again, the brunettes mind wandered to how she was supposed to do this sleepover. She really, really wanted to do it as normal. movie, popcorn, candy, pizza... she allowed herself to think about it joyfully, longing for the past. but the thoughts quickly changed as 'she' reminded herself that made her sick.

she knew that the whole time she would have to be sneaky. sneaky with changing, eating, everything.

By the end of the break she had a sturdy plan that would withstand her safely for the night, and slowly made her way to her next classes, each one tiring her out more and more that by the end of the day, she was ready to sleep for a millenium, but instead had to stay awake at this sleepover, to have control over it.

god forbid ONE thing went wrong, and it would all go to hell.


	4. just a sleepover

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ED TRIGGER WARNING

just a sleepover 

honestly, fallon found it easier than expected. the girls just chatted, ran around, jumped on the beds, and then settled down to watch movies.  
“let’s have popcorn!” monica declared.  
“um... ok! i’ll ask anders-“   
monica looked at her. “girl- i’ll go do it. stay here, i’ll be right back!”  
“ok!” fallon called to her, but monica had already made her way into the kitchen. fallon pulled out the remote and scrolled through the movie options just as a girl fallons age walked in.  
“boo.” she said halfheartedly and threw herself onto the couch.  
fallon turned to look at her from her position on the floor, glaring. “kirby, monica’s sleeping over.”  
“i know.” kirby replied, blatantly ignoring the hint. fallon let her stay, figuring jts more drama if she tells her to leave.   
a minute of awkward silence between the girls before monica popped in with popcorn, candy and sodas.  
“i found anders secret stash of candy!” she sung- tossing them over to the girls. “some of them are weird new zealand ones but i mean, it’s sugar.”   
Kirby didn’t hesitate ripping jnto a bag, stuffing the gummy worms into her mouth.  
“fal did you decide on a movie?” monica asked, settling in as well.  
“oh, um.” truth is she had completely forgotten to do that. she’d been forgetting a lot more lately. “i thought you and kirby would want to choose.”  
“sweet,” kirby said, grabbing the controller from fallon. monica and the redhead argued a little back and forth, and it took fifteen minutes before they decided on some rom com they could all basically quote at this point. fallon zoned out for most of the movie, only snapping out of it when monica started talking to her.  
“fal? fallon? hello?” she said, her hand waving in front of the other girls face. “i asked if you wanted some popcorn?”  
“what? oh, no i’m good. you two can have the rest.” she replied, returning her attention to the screen. but kirby didn’t drop it. she grabbed the bowl from monica and put it in front of fallon.  
“are you SURE?” she said, wafting the buttery, melty, scent to fallon. she seemed to know more than she was letting on. “you haven’t eaten anything all day- just have some...”  
“wait, what?” monica cut off kirby. “that’s not true- she ate lunch in the classroom to finish her project.”  
kirby eyed fallon, and her eyes looked at her sisterly figure pleadingly.   
“oh. sorry, my bad. i forgot about lunch.”   
monica snickered at her and unpaused the movie. there wasn’t any talking or giggling for the rest of it- just and awkward silence.  
when the movie ended the three girls all turned to their phones, scrolling through tiktoks, checking their messages, making small talk with each other before kirby announced that she wanted pizza.  
“how can yoh already be hungry? we just ate all that candy and stuff!” fallon said, amazed by her friends absolute disregard for her stomachs digesting system.  
“ummm, correction, WE ate all of that. besjdes, i’m always hungry. and sleepovers have pizza. end of story. follow me or not.” she hopped up and ran to the dining room, crashing into a maid on the way.  
fallon and monica exchanges glances and then followed her reluctantly, both knowing its better to just agree with kirby.  
kirby and monica ate their pizza- and fallon picked at hers until the other girls were done and then resided up to fallons room to put on pajamas.  
kirby and monica rushed up the stairs, but for some reason fallon was really struggling. every step felt like a mile and by the time monica and kirby were at the top she was barely there. despite the red flag it raised in the back of her head, she pushed through and ignored it.  
kirby and monica were already changed when fallon got to her room. she grabbed a set of matching pajamas and shyly turned away, pulling her shirt over her head.   
she heard the small gasps from her friends as they started whispering but ignored it and just quickly slid into her pjs, her cheeks flushed.  
the voice had warned her and now they were going to try and make her stop.  
“they know...” it said, slithering around her mind, causing her arms to tingle and her breath to shorten. “they’ll tell someone and you’ll lose everything.”  
Fallon ignored the voice and turned around to her friends, desperate to change the subject.   
“boys.” she blurted, as it was the first thing she thought of.  
“and what about them?” monica asked, flopping onto fallons bed with kirby in tow.  
“cute ones. spill.” fal continued, flustered.   
“oh.” kirby said, her cheeks redder than usual. “um... i don’t really know...”  
“ok?”mom replied, rolling her eyes. “well, stevens hot.”  
“oh SHUT UP!” fallon yelled, tossing a pillow. “that’s my BROTHER!”   
“i know.” mon said teasinly, “and what about it?”  
the girls giggled about it before it turned silent again, and kirby turned to monica, mouthing something with was replied with a nod.  
“fallon...” kirby started, nervous.  
she froze. her hairs stood up and she felt like the world was crashing. “yes?” she squeaked out, avoiding all eye contact.   
“we noticed something. you lost a LOT of weight and you haven’t been yourself. are you ok? what’s going on?”

fallon couldnt breathe. she twisted the loose hair tie around her wrist and racked her brain. “yeah, i’m just tired. and i’ve always had a fast metabolism, you know that. plus all the running...” she was prepared to ramble on and on when monica stepped in.  
“oh thank GOD fal!” she said, tossing her arms around her best friend and hugging her, fallon wincing from the weight and crushing pain without notice. “we thought you had an eating disorder or something, like those models...”  
“we were SO worried!” kirby chimes in, relived. “we love you fallon.”  
“i, i love you guys too.”

relief set in and fallon enjoyed the rest of her night, but she couldnt ignore the feeling of fear and anxiety slowly growing in the pit of her stomach.  
something inside her, maybe a spark left over of the real fallon, knew she wasnt going to be able to keep this up much longer.


End file.
